The LIfe of Mom

        The Mom life is not always an easy road or journey to be on and yet it has so many rewards along the way. From the very moment when you find out your pregant and for the rest of your life you will always be going through different stages and development with your children which is a wonderful amazing reward in itself. I have felt heartbreak, pain, sadiness and happines along with pure Joy. I have my first born child my baby girl she was my first miracle child. I didnt think that I could ever have children I just thought that being a mother was not in the plans that God had for me and my life. As I was learning and begining to accept that fact I was still praying to God he would bless me to be a mother I vowed and promised I would train my daughter in his ways do my best to teach her about God. She would be his because he first knew her she was his before she was mine to raise love cherish her. Then surpize 6 years later here comes my son I was not expecting to be able to have another baby even though I had prayed for my son. I asked God and Prayed for a little boy. I was never suppose to have children and I know have two children, My son is now 6 years old about to turn 7 and my daughter is 12 about to turn 13. My son just started school last year while my daughter just started middle school last year. Now my daughter is in the 7th grade while my son is in the 1st grade. 

        This is for all my mamas out there you got this yes mother hood is frusrating when your kids dont want to listen to you. You told your little toddler no they cant have something that they want and they throw that big tantrum in the middle of the store or at check out your frustrated and so embrassed. Just rememeber to give yourself grace and mercy you are doing the best you can. When you sweet child decides she or he wants to grab a candy bar off that checkout shelf and start eatring that darn candy bar and your on a tight budget just to buy groceries and all your houshold items. I know at those specific times and moments you are stressed and worried about how you are gonna make it make ends meet how you are gonna stretch your last dollar down to the last penny. Mama try your best to jsut cherish those little moments take time to laugh have joy and peace in your life. Those are the memories that will last a lifetime in your mind as they grow up and get bigger they are no longer that little sweet child you remember what seamed like it was not so long ago. 

        When it comes to choosing how you want your birthing experiance for all my new mamas and curent pregant mamas please take my advice dont let any one tell you how you should have your birhting experiance or where. If you can choose how you want to have your birthing experiance that is the best advice I can give to you. I really do regret not having the birthing experiance I really wanted to have that was having a water birth. I wanted to do the whole natural birth and a water birth. I let other people tell me no I of course listened I didnt do my whole birthing expericance completely the way I wanted them. However I did get to have an all natural birth without any pain medications of any medicail inventions like a C-section. I was blessed however with my daughter I was fully dilated my water did not break the nurses kept telling me not to push I of course tried not to pushe when I felt the urge to push this was my first child my first child birthing experiance. They of course had to break my water with my daughter then I started to able to push her out. My whole experiance from my first contraction to giving birth I had my daughter in two hours of gettting to the hosptial. My son I had him within an hour of getting to the hospital I really wanted to have pain medication for the pain it was so painful but I was too far in my labor and dialted. This time when I had the urge to push to push I pushed I didnt let my nursint stuff or any body else tell me different this is my baby this is my body I knew when I needed to push or not I had my son within an hour of getting to the hospital. I know my birthing experiance how long it took me to have both my children is rare most women have a long labor and delivery time. I heard of so many stories of women being in labor for 3 days still have not dilated enouigh the had to do C Section for the safety of the baby and the mother. I also hear of horriable storys that some mothers they had to emergcncey C Section because the babys heart rate started to go down and the unbilical cord was wrapped around their babys necks. I heard of other horrible birthing stories when the mother was giving birth the baby died in the middel of givign birth she still had to push the baby out give the baby a name fill out a birth certificate and death certificate. I remeber watching one mama and her story she had twins she was so happy so was her family husband. She went to the hosptial like normal gave birht to her twins like normal they were prematur like most twins are from my understanding. This mama I watched her have to say good bye to one baby within the week then the second week she had to say goodbye to her second bye she gave birth to two babys then she had to say goodbye to both of them. Then she was worried about how she and her husband were gonna tell their other children that there little babys sibylings werer not gonna be coming home they are in heaven. 

         I am so thankful God didnt allow me to go through that pain of giving me a blessing of a child or two children then just to take them away from me. So to all my mamas out there who have experianced that kind of pain your not alone. My heart goes out to you all you are not forgotten. Your babys are not forgotten. For all my mamas out there who have experiance misscarrigages your are also not forgotten for we have love and lost went through our own pain. I know that experiance of a misscarriage is painful, the loss and the grief is all too real. People just expect you to move on and forget live your life. Everyday in the back of my mind I am always wondreing if my baby survived that I lost at four months in my pregancey what he or she would look like. What would her or his personality be like. Would he or she have look more like me or daddy. Would he or she have more of my charteristics and perosnality or daddys. I have misscarried 3 trimes in my life time the third misscarriage I had really hit home fo rme I really griefed hard the loss of that baby. I do wonder about my first two I misscarried. I am all so gratful for my two children I carried to full term healthy babys and gave brith to them they are still here with me. I am so very thankful they are my whole world. If you ever suffered the loss of a child no matter the circumstances your not alone in your grief and loss of child. My heart goes out to you I pray for you and your family to have peace, joy and happiness agian in your life. 

The Truth About Anxiety

        I want to bring awareness to anxiety as this is a topic that needs to be discussed and the truth to be shared about how it really is living with anxiety. I live with anxiety everyday. Anxiety is real its not just some made up condition. The things that normal average people worry about in dialy life is amplyifed 10x  that for someone who has anxeity. Worrying about how the bills are gonna get paid if there is gonna be enough money in the budget to pay them even if just enough to keep the lights on and the water on oh then there is rent thats gotta get paid these are all normal everyday life struggles. For someone who has anxiety we tend  worry about normal everyday life things the anxiety goes up and so does the stress then comes the sleepless nights and nail biting. Maybe one of the kids has something at school and I worry about if I gonnabe able to have the funds the money I need to be able to be that mom parent that I always bring something to my childrens event or class partys whatever it is they have going on at school I want to be that parent who always helps provide things the class needs. I worry about if what I got what I did for my childrens school or class is it good enough is it enougb is it not enough. What would happen to my kids if something happened to me. What if I get hurt how am I going to be able to afford taking care of myselgf and my kids how am I gonna provide for them. What if I died in accident something bad happened to me what would happen to my kids who would take care of them? On top of daily life stuggles living with anxiety I am always wporried about anythign and everything that could possiable happen all the what ifs this what if that happened then what would happen to me or my kids. I am alwasys thinking about different constantly running thboughts in my head of all the possiabilites of different things that could go wrong or right. I am always questioning if I am doing something right or wrong a parent and a mother. I am always constantly worried about my kids. I am constatnly worried if my kids are not home from school at the normal time they are suppose to be I get worried stressed out my anxiety flares up I get anxious nervous worried if something happened to them what if they missed their bus or fell asleep on the bus forgot or missed their bus stop.

Sacred Heart Hospital Pediatrics ER

        Well, I had to take a trip to Sacred Heart Hospital Pediatrics ER a hospital specifically for children. My son woke up early yesterday morning throwing up not feeling well. He was up and down all night throwing up he also was really hot to the touch. My son complained his tummy hurts and his head hurts he had a headache. We waited patiently in the waiting room of the ER for an hour after we checked in and were finally seen by the triage or ER Nurse. We still had to go back out in the waiting room to be called in the back to be placed in a patient's room in the ER department. 

        My son poor baby he was so dehydrated that they had to do IV they do the children IV differently. It's like a straw. My son needed to have fluids they gave him through his IV. The doctors and nurses were all very kind, gentle, caring and understanding. The doctors and nurses gave Childrens Mortin by mouth and steroid medicine through his IV. They also were monitoring his blood pressure, pulse and heart rate instead of a blood pressure cuff they had what looked like a band aid wrapped around his thumb. They had the respiratory specialist come in give him a breathing treatment basically inhaler.

        I was so worried and scared about my baby boy that he may have COVID 19 possibly. I have never been so scared. I can feel my anxiety rising I had to remain calm and be strong for my son. I wanted to cry as I watched my baby boy, my child, my son be in pain not his normal happy self he was so tried and sleepy. I am so thankful for the life coach Sacred Heart his job was to make sure my son understood what was going to happen what the doctors had ordered what the nurses' jobs was sop that he could start feeling better. 

        The Xray techs were even so understanding when they took the x-rays they needed of his tummy and chest. My son did everything the Xray techs asked him to do. This was whole new experience for both myself and my son. The life coach even came back in helped keep him distracted and talked my son through the process of the IV what they call a straw that's what they use for children because their veins are so small and little. I wanted to cry I just comforted my son and talked to him to keep thinking about other things. He was very calm and brave he cried once then he was fine. I never knew that they had such a thing called a life coach to help explain the process of different procedures to help with children understanding things that's going to happen or been done to them. 

        I believe all hospitals should have life coaches for children and other people or individuals that need them. Life coaches is great for hospitals to have for patients that need the help the patients through the different procedures and processes. This helps the patients to be calm and prepared to know what is going on what is going to be done to them and their body's. 

        I want to thank all the Doctors, Nurses, Xray Tech and the Life Coach that was all there at the hospital taking care of my son during his time at the hospital in the ER. 

         My family we just finally got a new puppy that we all love so much . He is a pitbull and he is just so sweet he loves to cuddle and and play. He was the runt of his litter the other puppys were chunky and chubby so cute. I am glad we picked our new addition to our family. My children are happy that they finally got a puppy a dog that can grow up with them be a family dog and guard dog for protecting the family and our home. We just have to pick out a name for him. I dont know what we want to name him. Every name we try to figure out a name there the name we either agree we don't like or it just dont fit our new fur baby.  I think we finally settled on the name of shadow. Picking a name for a new fur baby can be hard when you want to make sure you pick a name that fits your fur baby. I want to make sure we pick a name that fits our new fur baby not only how he looks, but his personality. I want to make sure we pick a name that is just right. He is defintely a snuggle bug and so sweet. 

        Pit Bulls get a bad rep or name of being mean and vicious when actually thats the furtherest from the truth. Matter of fact Pit Bulls are rated the most people friendly, children friendly, human social, they have been proven to pass higher scale on the temperament tests then any other breeds. The Pit bull will also do anything to please its master. The owner can most cetainly control a pit bulls' behavior by how you raise the pit bull. A pit pull is not the one thats resposnable the being a good pit bull owner is up to the owner. Its not just pit bulls that can be aggressive its how the owner raises the pit bull and treat the pit pull. Pit bulls are not as vicisous as people say they are and they are not as mean as people say they are.

Thinking Positive Is Powerful Thinking

     I am from from perfect I dont evern try to be perfect becuase I got tried and weary of trying to be so perfect a goal I will never meet. Instead I strive to be myself who God created me to be with all my imperfect flaws, unique, corky, silly, and werid self. I had to learn to imbrace myself and all my imperfect flaws and imperfections. I had to learn to love my self that means loving all of me my whole self including my imperfect mind, body, skin, spirit and soul. I am not perfect I am a working progress and God isnt done with me yet. He is still working on me all of me not just the parts I want to see or what others see the invisiable parts you and I cant see the parts that are deep inside me. I had to learn to rely on God and not myself. I had to humble myself and ask God to show me what he sees when he sees me or looks at me. When I asked God to show me what he see's when he looks at me my whole perspective my whole point of view changed about my self. I was no longer seeing or looking at what I saw or what other people said about me. I was seeing myself in a whole new light becuase God opened up my eyse to a whole new view.

        I still have to do constantly and daily think postitive about myself which changes my whole mindset about who I am. Thinking Positive is very Powerful Thinking God warns us in his word that whatever we thinkenth in our hearts so thats what we are. I have to kindly remind myself I am child of God and I was created in his image. Therefore I am not ugly and unloveable. I am loved by God because he is the one that made me, created me knitted me, formed me together in my mohters womb even before she knew or was aware I even existed in her belly. To my mother I was mistake she made when she was young lady still in high school. I know my mom loves me in her own unique way. To her I was mistake because she didnt want to have a baby while in school matter of fact she never wanted to have any babys, kids or children. God used my mother and father to produce me so he could create me in his image to be like him in my mothers womb. 

        I am still learning who I am in Jesus and my heavenly father God who loves me so much. My mindset has completely changed. I am learning how to control my emotions instead of letting my emotions control me or get the best of me. I am learning how to still speak my mind how I think and feel without gettig so upset, angry or frustated that other people are not understanding how or the way I feel or see things. I still have my weak moments where I get depressed becaue my life is not easy as I see other peoples life seams so easy. I see people and watch people they seam to have it all together but I had to learn what I dont see is the struggle of the road they had to walk and travel on. I had to learn I had to stop comparing my life, goals, success and struggles to everyone I see and thats around me.I dont know what they had to go through to get to where they are and they dont know what I had to go through to get to where I am. I have my good days and bad days. I have like I dont understand why God would would give me the gift of a slow learning disability that affects how I learn things. It makes it really hard to find a job, get a job and keep a job expecially one that I am capable of doing. I feel like no matter how hard I try I am just stuck I am not going anywhere. I dont have and cant gain or learn the skills that most people can at the pace or rate employers want me to. I learning to love myself and my slow learning disability and not to let my learning disabiliy define me and who I am. Its very hard to not let my slow learning disability define who I am because its a part of me and who I am. 

        Thinking positive and positive self talk is real and does really help. As you are reading my words about my life your probaly thinking yeah right. Positive thinking is not powerful thinking but you could not be more wrong because that is so far from the truth. Maybe your thinking that okay yeah this positive thingking is powerful it works but not for me. Well have your even tried it I mean really tried it and be conistent and start where you are build on it like stepping stones you are building a staircase. Imagine and vision that you are builidng a staircase to your goals, your dreams to the life you want for yourself and your family. Those steps that are built upon each other each one each step is built form and on the previous one. Progress not perfect takes time step by step small goals on top of small goals , small dreams on top of small dreams and the ulimate goal and dream is at the very top, We can not get their without hard work and beaing fruit without God. We have to have God in the center of it all with God we can achieve all things. Imagine with a mindset like God what we can achieve if we are constantly postitive thinking whcih is powerful and we renew our mindset with Gods word we align our thinking what we believe about God ourselves then we transform our minds, hearts, spirits, souls and our lives. Our mindset is the control center of our life it controls our thiniking how we believe, feel, relationships and experiance life.

The Struggles of Having a Slow Learning Disability

        I am so tried of the stegmia of having a slow learning disabilitys and people always judging me. When people look at me they dont see the my disability I get dirty looks or looks on peoples faces says Yeah right I dont believe you. Disability does not have a certain look. You cant see my disability because its not a pyshcial disability. My disability affects how I learn things and I learn things at a slow pace then the average normal person. I was diagnosed as a young child with a learning disability. Matter of fact it was not my teacher or the school that noticed I had a learning disability. My mom is the one that caught and notied that I had a learning disability.  My mom had to fight with the school to have them hold me back in the first grade I still was not able to keep up with my classmates in a regular classroom. I was then tested over and over again with different tests. I was finally put in special education classes and I also had to take speach therapy. I had a speach problem. 

        The struggle for someone like me who has a disablitlity the struggle is even harder and ways more intense. Its easy for a normal average person to go to a job interview and land the job. I have been to job interviews and when I discussed with interviewer usually its a manager that I did have a learning disabiltiy they really dont understand what that means. I have been hired for jobs and fired from jobs because I wasnt able to learn how to do the job fast enough the manager didnt have time to train me properly. Its emabrassig and its humilating to lose your job because of a slow learning disability I was born with. I cant control how I learn things or how fast I learn things. I can learn new things it just takes me longer to learn them.

       My slow learning disability makes it hard for me to find a job I can do. I have tried to get a disability check or get my SSI disabiliy check back since I become an adult, I have been denied every time I applied for my disability check or SSI check. I cant get a disbility check or SSI check I can find and hold a study job that I cam capable of doing makes it hard to be able to stand on my own two feet and be able to support myself. I am so tried of people and my own family judges me acts like just because I have slow learning disability doesnt mean that I dont understand how to do things  for example saying things I cant manage money like my aunt telling my mom that dont put me down as one of her benefiicares on her life insurance money because of my learning disability I wont know how to handle her last dying affairs. My slow learning disability does not affect me knowing how to manage money and making sure I pay bills when they are due. My slow learning disability does not affect knowng how to take care of last and final affairs when it comes to someones death making sure the cost of having them buried or cremated is covered and paid. I am completely capable of doing all of those things and so much more.

        Please who ever reads this blog post next time you meet someone dont judge them before you get to know someone. Please dont judge your own family, coworkers, friends or friends before you really get to know them and their story and life struggles. 

Breastfeeding Support

        When I first become a mom in Novemember of 2009 I had these high espectations of being able to pump more than ounce of breast milk and I needed to have an electronic breast pump. I wish I knew what I know now that the mamas who were able to pump more than ounce or two from each breast combined were over producers. Thats not he average normal breast milk a nursing and pumping mama should be able to pump. I wish I would have known that I would have a hard time breast feeding my son when I had daughter my first born I would have contuined breast feeding her longer then what I did. When I had my son in 2015 I wanted to breast feed so badly but he would latch on correctly and I knew about nursing mamas who had the same problem and I asked the nurses over and over agian for the nurse lactation nurse to come in help me. 

        The lactation nurse was not very helpful at all I asked her about nipple tool for breast feeding mamas who are having a hard to getting their little babies to latch on correctly I told the nurse I cant get him to latch on correctly to help me get him to latch on right. The lactation nurse was rushing she was not helpful at all I had no support I felt so alone. I coulnt understand why I was having such a hard time getting my son to latch on when I had no pronblem getting my daughter to latch on when I had her in 2009. I know each baby was different I felt like a such a failure as a mom I knew that breast milk is best then formula I wanted to breastfeed but my son just wasnt having it. He just used me as a pacifier to go to sleep he wouldnt eat. He made my boonbs so sore at first once I got him to latch on correctly he just juse me as pacifier. He wasnt drinking enough milk. 

        I eventually just had to stop breastfeeding him altogether and just straight formula feed him because he wasnt getting enough of the fatty milk he needed. My body just wanst producing enough milk because the first few days was crucial that I needed him to latch on correclty to get my body to produce the milk it needed to be able to feed my baby boy my son. I felt like a bad mother to this day I wish I could have gotten him to latch on correctly. I had to learn that it was okay sometimes some babys dont latch on correctly.

        If your a breastfeeding mama or mama who wants to breastfeed look into community support groups for mamas who are breastfeeding. I wish I would have known more about the breastfeeding support groups so I could have had the support I wanted and needed when I was breastfeeding. Talk to your OBGYN talk to your doctor about your plans to breastfeed so that they can help give you all the support you need to breastfeed your baby. Talk to your doctor ask about breastfeeding support groups and any other breastfeeding support information they may have to give to you that your not awarte of. If you dont like your lactation nurse at the hosptial ask for another one if there is another you can help thats avaibale. 

        Also I wish I would have know that there was things I could have done to help my body to produce milk. Here is what I found you can make 

The Truth of Motherhood and Being a Stay at Home Mom

             I love being a stay at home and all the rewards I get from my children. I get to wake up every morning and wake up my my children every morning. I get to help get my youngest my son who is just 6 years old. There are some days he wants his mommy's help to get dressed and other days he wants to be independent and dress his self. My daughter is 12 years she is my oldest she can dress her self and do her own her. She defintely has her own unique style and she does not care about peoples opionions about her style and clothes. My daughter as long as she feels comfrontable and confident in her clothes thats all that matters to her. I get the joy and happiness watching my children grow and develop into their own unique independent personalilties and style. I get to hear my son tell me everyday that he loves me and how much he loves me. My daughter is hiting her teen years she has her own unique attitude that she isnt gonna take no crap from nobody. She often comes to me to asking me for advice about her friends. My daughter sometimes comes to me telling me about things she deals with from school and her friends just for me to listen. My daughter knows I am that mama bear that she tells makes me promise mama you wont go to my school I have it handled I just need you to listen so you know whats going on. I love my children dearly they know I will do anythig and everything I can thats in my power for them. I get to be there for my chldren for any after school sports or activites. 

           Being a mom is defintely one of the hardest job I ever had to do and the most rewarding job I have had, Being a mom is not  all fun and games. Being a mom means that love my children so much that i want want the best for your children and I  know I have to discpline my children even if it breaks my heart. Being a mom means I also get to treat and spoil my children. Being a stay at home mom I get be home when my children get out of school I have a choice I can go pick them up from school or just be home when they get off the school bus. Being a stay at home mom means I get to be the first face my kids see when they wake up in the morning and the first face they see when they get home from school. I get to be the one that fixes them after noon snack unless they want to fix it themselves. I get to be the one home with them cooking dinner for them. 

        What some stay at moms dont talk about is the fact it gets lonely sometimes being home all day long by yourself. By the time your spouse, boyfriend or husband comes home from work all we want to do is have an adult conversation finally with another adult have that compaionship. All the spouses, boyfriends or husbands wants to do is relax being left alone and unwind. Being a stay at home mom can get lonely. I am glad I have my facebook friends and family I can talk to during the day. I am also going back to school. I am attending Bryan University I recieve FAFSA to pay for my college education. I am a personal trainer student in the Associates Degree in Applied Exercise And Fitness Program. Going back to school means I can work on my assignments while my children are in school which will help pass the time. I can focus my engery on school completeing my assignments. I alos joined different groups on facebook like a quit smoking group which helped give me the support I needed to quit smoking. 

        The truth of being a mom is its amazing and wonderful  but it also can be very difficult and frustrating. Motherhood gets lonely as your children grow up you feel more and more less needed as they grow into and find their own independence. Motherhood there is alot of sleepless nights filled with tears and fear.  Motherhood is its filled with broken heart every time one of your children gets hurt physically or someone breaks their heart. Motherhood its hard to let go let your children grow up go off with their friends without you and to trust them enough to know what to do if something happens. Motherhood isnt all filled with rose garden even roses have throns. 

My Health and Fitness Journey

        I have been working really hard on making healthier chocies when it comes to my eating habits.  already have limited my soda and sugar intake. I have completely cut out all sodas in my diet. I am completely changing my lifestyle around including my eatting habits. I completely cut out all sugar no sweets or sugar addeed to any of my foods when I prepare them or when my hubby cooks. I have already cut out all added salts and salty snacks like chips. When I use seassonings I chose to use Mrs. Dash Salt Free Seasongs when I go to the grocery store I will pick up all kinds of seasonings that are salt free. I only use Sea Salt or Pink Himalayan Salt. According to articles and research I have found that Pink Himalayan Salt has 84 essential trace elements required by our body. The Pink color in Pink Himalayan salt is defintely nore naturtal then sea salt just another reason why I am considering changing the type of salt I am currently using. Most of the health specialist actually rank Pink Himalayan Salt higher than other salts. Did you know salt helps our body reglulate blood preasure, assist in nerve function, and helps your cells perform their function to keep organs healthy. Both Sea Salt and Himalayan Salt are a healhier option since they both are excellent sources of sodium chloride which is vital to our health.

         I also started making home made smoothies with fruits and veggetables. I will take a little water put it in my blend jet then add my fruit blend and veggies of all kinds. I even started eating salads and when I want a really good pasta salad I replace the normal pasta with veggie pasta. I also have been drinking more water on a daily basis. I even quit smoking which is really hard to do. I have been eatring cooked hard boiled eggs in the morning with avacado for breakfast I only season it with Sea Salt or Pink Himalayan Salt and Pepper, Lemon Jucice freshly squeezed from a Lemon and/Or Lime Juice Fresly squeezed from a lime. I also have fresh brococoli, carrots, tommotoes, Bell Peppers, Mashrooms and other veggies and fruits like Watermelon, catalope, peachs, strawberrys, grapes. apples I will have make a mixture of a fruit and veggie tray for snacks. I also make mixture of fruit and veggie smoothie I will add more fruit then veggies if I am really craving something sweet this helps keep me from wanting something sweet like ice cream, cookies or cakes I shoulnt eat. I defintley dont eat any cereal because it has way too much sugar. Its concious choice I make everyday everyday to eat healthier and choice the healhiest option. I am chosing to eat healhier for my own health and fitness goals.

The Begining of My Quit Smoking Journey

         I officially have quit smoking and I have been smoke free for a whole week. I was ready to quit smoking and I was and I am determined to quit smoking for good and be successful. The first step I had to do was be ready, determined and committed to quit smoking and thats the very first step if you or any body else wants to quit smoking cigerattes.  Second step is I went ahead and bought myself some gum so when I have that craving that does come fast and hard at me I can pop a peice to a few pieces in my mouth to chew on to help me fight through my cravings. I also came to relize and found out during the frist few days wasd my toughest days due to the fact after you had your last cigeratte your body will go through detox process just like I did. I had to take the whole weekend I just layed in bed let myself go hrough the detox process. During your first week of being smoke free you will find yourself at the times you are cracing a cigeratte that you will have the urge to snack or eat more then you would normally when you were smoking thats because your body and mind the conections what I like to call the connectors or sensors are all messed up that gives the singal that we are hungry are messed up have to be reprogrammed essenttially so you may find youself once you start to go through the detox process and your first few days to the first week eating more then normal. 

        I started going to the gym about a month ago to start geting fit and healthy now I am working on qutiting smoking my nasty habit of cigerattes. I also started to drink more water and keep track of my water intake and watch what I am earting. I started to make and create fresh smoothies from fruits and veggies mixed togather, I also use the feresh fruits and veggies to snack on during the time I get and have those nasty cracings to want to smoke a cigeratte. I also made a smoothie at the times of the cravings to help keep me from smoking a cigarette and or at those times when I crave something sweet instead of eating ice cream or cookies or cake I would make a smoothie and drink it and helped me get thorugh those tough sweet cravings. I am also taking a product called control from Everra to help me with those nasty cravings. Control all you do is add it to your water of 12-16 ounces shake or stir and drink it when you feel snackie you can even add it to your smothies if you want like I do.

        I also have been working at the gym but I also have been doing some of my own workouts at home to help with the cigeratte cravings. You can do some Squats, Butt Bridges, Pointed Butt Lifts, Fire Hydrant, and Heal Kicks. I also do a little Yoga I started back doing some yoga and pilates as well.  I went to my local walmart and purposely bought myself some fitness yoga matts with yoga gloves and yoga socks and a yoga block. I also purcahsed a yoga bag on amazon I found that has the best strapes that are comfy on my shoulders. I also recently purcahsed myself a new gym bag for my gym days. I definitly only recommend going to the gym for a few days out of the week in between take a rest day. I am know for me I went to the gym yesterday and today I just wanted to get back in the gym. So if you do find yourself that you want to stay in the gym you may jsut found your calling to help others want to losse wight and get healthy just liked I found my calling the same calling I had burried so long ago kept brushing aside and putting it off. Now I finally am going afrter my passion, my calling and dream I will achiecve my dream . I will be successful smoke free momma I know if I can do so can anybody else.

        I rather be addicted to excerise geting fit and healhtier watching what I eat then to be a smoker jsut think about. Your lungs and organs will start to heal go back to normaly little by little. Yes there is some health risks after being a smoker for so long you have some unreversal demage to your body and organs. The good news is as you quit smoking each passing day your body is repairing itself little by little. You will may experiance some coughing and sneezing shortly after your last cigeratte you have decided to quit smoking. The coughing is noamal your bodys blood preause will go back to normal and your breathing and heart rate will start to go back to normal. You can also try to do some coloring get yourself some coloring pencils and coloring books I love using color pencils instead of cryaons. I alos find stress releilving I know thats why I started smoking in the first place to help me relieve stress and my anxiety now you will have to be just like me when you quit smoking to find a way to relieve the stress you feel and your anxity. I also recommend highly recommedn listing to some postive music of your chose and make sure you have some chewing gum on hand I can not recommend enough how important it is to have some chewing gum becuase if you experiance a long ride or commute to work or going somewhere you go everyday chewing on that gum will help you to remain smoke free on those long car rides and listening to some postive music to keep you mind positve on the right track I love listening to my postive christian music.

        Did you know how your biody repairs itself after quiting smoking?

                            Detoxing Stage

1) 20 minutes Heart Rate returns back to regualar levels.

2) 2 Hours Cravings Begin and Blood Pressure Drops to Normal Levels.

3) 12 Hours Blood Oxygen Returns back to Normal Levels and Carborn Monoxide Lowers in the body.

4) 24 Hours The Risk of a Heat Attack decreases.

5) 48 Hours Sense of smell and taste return.

6) 3 Days Excessive Nicotine is out of the body withdraw symptoms at their peak.  

7) 2-3 Weeks Improved Lung function and Physical abilities.

8) 1- 9 Months Cilia Fibers begin to repair themselves improving breathing.

9) 1 Year 50% Lower Chance of Heart Disease.

10) Risk of Diabeties returns to normal for women. The risk of Stroke Returns to normal for women and men.

11) 10 Years The chances of Lung Cancer Cut in Half 1/2.

12) The Risk of Heart disease is that of a non smoker like you have never smoked before.

        I know I have noticed now that I quit smoking I can stand for a longer period of time for example I can stand for a long period of time while I am washing dishes. Before when I had a whole pile of dishes to do I couldnt stand there more then maybe 20 minutes or less doing the dishes before I needed a break for a cigeratte, I also noticed my clothes and hair are just now starting to smell normal instead of like cigeratte smoke. I have noticed I can do different daily acitivities and tasks that needs to be done for long periods of time before needing a break. My hope and pray that as I share my fitness Journey and my smoke free journey with you that it helps your or someone you know to improve not only your life but your quality of life. 

The Beginning of My Personal Trainer Journey

             I am so happy I have decided that college isnt for me anymore I was not determined, motivated and I just didnt have the passion to attended college anymore. I guess I just thought or had in my mind that I was suppose to go to college in order to get my degree in order to have a better job and career. I guess in my mind I thought in order to finally have peoples respect in my family I had to get my degree from attending collge and be somebody. I have realized that not eveyone is cut out for college not everyone has to go to college in order to be successful. I dont havce go to college and finish to obtain my degree in order to be somebody and be successful. I had buried my passion for fitness dancing, yoga, Pilates and my passion to help others who struggle just like me that I had lost myself. I had to find myself again  I am so glad I found myself again and my true passion. 

        I am now taking online courses for Virtual Coching, Personal Trainer, Group Fitness Instructor, Zumba Instructor and CPR Training all through NASM and AFAA  and includes recerfifcations for life.Since after I finsih each course at my own pace I can complete all my course work at my own pace without any specific due dates for each assignemnt or quiz. I also can take my Ceritifcation test or exam online with a propertor watching me to ensure my final cerification exsm is legit and I am not cheating. I am really excited because I have the passion for helping people I want to help people like me who struggle with their weight and eating habits. I want to help the single parents and stay at home parents to get helahty and stay healthy in the process lose some weight in their comfront zone, at home in a gym or outside at a park through virtual training sessions. I want to help people and their whole familys get haelthy, fit and stay healthy and fit including learning how to make or create meals together or just for parents to help them create healthier meals the whole family loves. I can share my own life experiances recipes that I have tried that works for my whole family. I just want to help people genuniely to love healthier happier lives includning their famly. 

        I just had to remember I can be myself and I had to find myself slowly over time agian. I know who I am now. I had to learn how to love myself agian and embrace myself and including my body. I can still love my body nobody my size all while trying to improve myself . I can still love myself and my body all while I am trying to do all the right things to lose weight, get fit, and healthy to better myself so I can be the best version of me for my family. I want to help other parents and familys do the same.

Taking A Risk

     I am so proud of myself because I totally just took a whole new risk by signing up with a Bundle of courses to take along with a personal trainer course. The course I am currently taking and working on is Virtualy Coaching course. I have already completed the first chapter and passed the quiz with a 80%. I have to have a 70% or better to pass each quiz diuring the course. I am working on getting through the second chapter reading the material and taking notes, Taking notes using microsoft word as I am reading my digital textbook. I can work at my own pace getting through all my courses. I am also gonna be taking up Fitness Group Instructor so I can teach all kinds of Fitness classes including dance fitness, stretching classes teach people how to stretch before and afrter a workout properly. I can even teach yoga and pilates. I am also gonna be taking Zumba course so I can teach Zumba Fitness Classes. This will give me a verity of classes I can teach that I will be ceritifed to teach, I will also be more valueable to my clients and at the gym of my choosing that I choose to work at. I have already applied to some gyms as a customer service representaitve. Just so I can get my foot in the door working at the gym while I am working through my self paced courses. I also have included in my bundle of courses that I have a lifetime free contiuned education courses so I keep all my ceritifiecations up to date. I  can contiune my education further my education without hacing to go to college. I feel so much happier and free I can take as long as I need to study and get through all my course material without any deadlines to meet or due dates I most certainly can extend my time I need to contiune to work though any of my courses If I need to. I am so exicted to be going through all these changes and creating a new path in life. I am just taking all this in and actually enjoying it. I am so glad I taking this amazing New Life Journey. I am so glad I have made this change I feel so relieved and stress free. I feel like a heavy burden has lifted off my shoulders. I am finally really can be happy not only for myself but for my kids. I work on course in my free time aorund my kids schdule and familys schedule. I dont have to give up spoending time with them just to attend school. I am so glad I made this huge change in my life now fo glad I finally decided to go for what I really wanted to do that I hace a passion for. I am so glad I am not gonna let what people might think about me or my decision to stop me from really doing what I really wanted to do for so long.

Ways To Properly Store Foods To Make Your Daily Life Easier

     I just learned a few things in an article I came accross on facebook so of course I pulled up the artcle . The artcle talks about 14 foods that we often store incorrectly. so as I was reading the article I learned a food things aobut how to prperly store foods I never even knew that I was doing all wrong. For example my grandmother always use to put her bread in the fridge. I have aunt who keeps her bread sometimes in the fridge. I know I for one sometimes will put my bread in the fridge. Did you know hat if you put your bread in the fridge it actually does not last that long because at lower temperatures, water evaporates seignificantly faster and so the bread will become stale very quickly. You can however put the bread in the freezer and it will stay fresh fr 4-6 months. I do remember when I was growing up my mom, my sisters and I would go to the bread store pick up several loafs of bread we would freeze it in our deep freezer. This of course saved us some time and money on bread. For one we would go to the bread store and the bread is cheepaer at the bread store then at the grocery store. Secondly we would buy serveral loafs at a time we would freeze them so we would have the bread when we needed it. Instead of having to run to the grocery store to buy bread this saved us time, money we would have spent on gas and of course saved on the cost of the bread itself. Another great tip and advice in the artcle I read is that bread is best kept n a frimly closed bread box with a little bit of salt that will protect the bread from mold. The bag the bread comes in it defintey will stay soft but the downside is the bread will mold in a few days because the bread cant breathe and fungi really love the high humidity. No wonder why bread molds so quickly no wonder why my grandnother had a bread box to put her bread in so it would be safe from mold, the bread would be soft and last alot longer then leaving it in the bag it came in  or puting it in the fridge.

Chocoalate is best stored in cold, dark places not in your fridge, Honey can almost be stored forever if stored poperly. You should store it poperly and best also in cold dark places never in the fridge.Onions and galic I always kept in the fridge but the properly to store your onions and garlic is to store them in cold, dark places. For example in a box in the cupboard. Onions you can tie them to one another and hang them up and keep them hanging.

    Things that can be kept on a kitchen shelf or on the table according to this article are oranges and other cirtrus fruits they wont go bad any time soon. Avacadosis if they are ripe you can store them in the fridge save them from going bad. If your avacados are not yet ripe you shouldnt put them or keep them in the fridge because it slows down the riping process.Cucumbers certianly can be stored in the fridge but only for a few days. To keep veggies fresh for as long as possiable you should keep them outside of the fridge.Eggplant should be kept at room temperature for best storage and away from direct sunlight. Tomatoes is best to store this babys in room temperature as well.

According to the article the things best stored in the fridge are the following:eggs and dont remove teggs fromt the container they come in and most certianly dont put them in the door of rhe fridge. What wait then why do fridges come with those places in the door to store eggs in?  Flour should be stored in  a closed jar so bugs and mold cant ruin the flour. Also keep your flour in a closed jar and place in your fridge or in a cuboard. Nuts should also be stored in the fridge for best freshness and long lasting. Use alumium foil not plastic wrap/

Being Stay at home mom Is lonely and Boring sometimes

     Being a stay at home mom is rewarding and it is fun at times, rough at times, and to be honest can be boring and lonely at times. Being a stay at home mom gets lonely at times because your with your kids 24 hours a day and 7 days week all day long without any  adult conversations. You dont get to have some adult real conversations during the day except when your out and about in the grocery store, taking kids ot the doctors appoinment, ER vist or some errand you have to run get little adult conversation in during your vists. I miss out on those meaningful adult conversations with my friends I use to have since I have moved to another state so have all my adult friends that are also moms.  We all live in completely different states. This why I love being active on social media platforms so I can have some meangful conversations with my friends and all the new friends I have made. The Internet and social media has made it easy for me to stay connected to my old dearest friends and I am able to make new friends and connections along the way through the years.I am blessed to have my friends that are geuniely caring and loving and so supportive no matter what I want to do in life. I can just have some general conversations with them just being able to talk to them about anything I may be going through that day or week just to talk and just check in with each other. I have found my passion for writing again. Slowly and surely I am getting back some of protery writing back I use to write potery. I would just write potery that came to me and I would just write it down. I have not writen potery in a long time. I really didnt think years ago my potery was really any good so I guess I kinda quit writing through the years. Life happens I really did not feel like I had much time for it anymore. I was always busy doing something bewteen working and school then I had my kids. 

    Somewhere in I lost myself quit writing now here I am starting to write on my blog more be consistent with my writing. I am not really worried about if any one reads it just a way for me to kinda keep a Journal about my life as a mom. Blogging helps me releieve stress free, worry free, its a way I can express myself write about my tough days just write about whaterver comes to my mind care free. I can write about my life and the life I want. Blogging is a way I can write I dont have to care about what anybody thinks or believes about me. I can express my self freeely. What a great feeling it is to just write about anything and everything so freely without having to worry about other people juding me.can be totally my self without the fear of judgement form any one. Our society and our world is so correpted with so many judgemental people instead of caring geunine loving people who actually care they are far in between they are the rare dimonds. Friendships should never be taken granted cherish your fiends and family your close with because you never know when you will take your last breathe and you never know when your cherish loved ones will take their last breathe,

Who loves Zumba Fitness Classes

  Who loves Zumba fitness classes I am seriously giving it some serious thought about becoming a Zumba Instructor so I can still be the stay at home mom I want to be and have a job and career I love that can take me far. I have been doing some serious research on how to become a zumba instructor starting with zumba.com right on Zumba's website. Zumba is not only a way I can get into shape get fit help me live a active fun healthy lifestyle I can in return help others get fit help them live a healthy active lifestyle as well. I love to dance and I always had intrest in dance and I just never had that opporutity to take any dance clases. I love fitness dancing so why not look into becoming a Zumba instructor. I can do the online course and take as much time as I need to learn the course materal chros and get my cerification and Liscense from Zumba to teach classes. I can either look into getting hired at gyms even sub classes when needed I also can teach Zumba virtual class on Zoom. I can create my own schedule around my familys schedule and needs. Also becoming a Zumba instructor will help me become more of indepedent by earning my ncome. I cant wait until I can start my Zumba instructors courses to become ceritified and liscense through Zumba be offically a Zumba instructor so I can start teaching Zumba classes virtually and in person classes. I am so excited about this journey I will hopefully be able to embark and start to be able to start soon.

Enjoy Motherhood

    Motherhood is not is not easy nobody said that motherhood would be easy. Being a mom is no easy job, yes being a mom is a job it often gets taken for granted and looked at like its not a job. Expecially being a stay at home mom gets often looked like its not a job its not that hard. Well I am here to tell you yes it a very hard Job being a stay home mom you have balance and multi task all day. You have to clean the house including washing the dishes, putting away the dishes. Fix your kids breakfast then clean up after breakfast wash the dishes again. Oh lets not forget the mid morning snacks, prepare lunch cleank up the lunch and snacks mess. Oh I got to wash some luandry and getting something ready for dinner that day. I am gonna share with you what I happen to find and came across. 

    Motivate yourself and enjoy motherhood.                                                                                     

1)Take a shower and (Get Ready) change your mindset while getting ready. There is nothing more motivating then to get ready for the day than to feel squeeky clean. Put on some real clothes not those mommy sweatpants or clothes but real clothes and while you are at go ahead and put litle bit of makeup on to help you feel ready for the day.

2)Get Out leave the house or go somewhere different. Get outside for some fresh air or surround yourself around others if you're extrovert and require social interaction. The simple act of leaving the house or your typical environment can be a toatl game changer for your mood. Take your kids to the park if the weather permitts or plan inside activity for your kids at your local musem go to mommy and me play group or plan one one playdate in your area take your kids to your local libary. Check out books and movies.

3)Practice Mindfulness, Take the time to look inward and listen to God. Mindfulnes is a way of learning to pay attention to whatever is happening in your life, It gives you a greater sense of connection to your life inwardly and outwardly . It caltivates clarity, insight and understanding. I myself need to pratice more mindfulness in my everyday life. 

4)Get and stay organized implement systems that work for you.Get yourself a planner you will love and enjoy using everyday. I highly recommend finding a Tulia XII consultant and order yourself a plnaner cover of your choices and choose the inserts for your planner thats suit you and your family needs. Thiis can go with being mindful and setting intentions. Getting organized and keeping systems in place can bring down your stress levels. To start find a daily schedule you can stick to.                     

Heartbroken Begining To Think and Believe That College May Not Be Possiable For Me!

         I am so scared I always wanted to go to college to get my degree I have been so stressed I been did really good in the begining. I got really goood grades but now I am struggling after hurricane sally hit and my soon to be sister in laws health problems. I have been struglling to keep up in my classes so I dedcided that taking one class per sub term so I could focus on one class at a time. I am still strugling to keep up the second week of school and I am not done with the first weeks assignments. I have to watch you tube videos just to understand what I am even doing in for my class assignments. I really am starting to believe and think myabe people were right about me that I can and I will never finsih college and get my degree because I am just not capbale of doing it God just didnt put in his plans for me. I keep praying and trying this time my best just is not good enough. I am heartbroken and very upset about this I just think the best and believe the best thing for me is that I just need to give up on college and just focus and put all my engery into my family and business with God in the center of it all he is most certainly put first. I know without him I would have never made it this far. 

        Its been a very hard decion to make for me to finally say its time for me to say okay college just isnt for me. God created me different he created me with a slow learning disabililty I have struggled with my whole life. I had to work really hard to get my GED I am so proud of that. I know that is time I stop trying to get my business degree and stop trying to go to college when all I am going to do is fail my classes I already been put on acadmic warning now I am on acadmic probation if I fail any of my class this term or semester I will lose my finicial aid. I have already wasted so much of my time and grant and loan money on college. So after this term of my classes I will be emailing my school to let them know and I will no longer be attending school. This is just another chapter ending in my story. 

        The only way I will not give on on going to college is if I can some how manage to get caught up in my current class so I can pass my class so I wont loose my fincial aid. That has to be a miracle perfomed by God himself. Then I will have to think about how I am going to pay back all my school student loans I recieved. I have no idea how I am gonna do that. Please do not judge me I am only sharing my story is because I feel this is the only safe place I can share and write about how I am feeling what I am going through. Please keep me in your prayers and pray for me.

God Is Calling Me To Tell My Story!

        I know God is calling me to tell my story, for my story to be my testimony for his glory. I would love to tell my whole story or testimony I am just not fully ready to tell my whole story or testimony just yet. I be slowly letting it all come out over the years in little moments I didnt realize that I was utill just the ohter day. I am far from perfect and my life is not perfect either. I  am finally beginging to be truly happy and enjoying my life. I am constatnly  growing and learning from all my mistakes each day.Here is just a little some of my story my testimoy. I have been working on building my own online boutique store with my multiple Networking Marketing Business I have to offer to my customers for a one stop shopping experiance with me as their personal stylist or shopping coach. I didnt quit trying to make direct sales, network marketing or mlm work for me even when my own my mom has told me directly that I need to get a real job. One of my sister even agreed and said our mom was right. I never gave up I know in my heart God made me for more and greater then just working at some company at a dead end job not going no where I cant be promoted up but so far and have to spend hours and hours upon hours away from my famliy and kids just to earn enough income to be able to prvode the life I want for myself and my famliy including my kids. At what cost? I will be missing my kids and watching them grow up. 

        Why can I not have the best of both worlds? I know in my heart and soul I was meant to own my own business and not work for someone elses business while they cash in all the money and bigt doe off the their little workers backs like the "The Queen Ant does she keeps having babies to be the worker ants" or How about the "Queen Bee she has so many worker bees at her beck and call that does all the work for her" I know God created me to be more then just to be a worker ant or worker bee! This is why I and I  love the the network marketing, direct sales or mlm industry because I can own my own independent business and be able to earn unlimited amount of income. I can build my dream of having and owning my own complete online boutique. I want the freedom and flexiability to create my own schedule and unlimited amount of income. I want to still be able to work my own schudule and earn an income all while being a stay at home mom to my beautiful kids. 

        I have signed up with mutliple diffreent mlm, direct sales or network marketing companys in the past. I always end up going inactive I didnt know how some people could be so successful while others struggled. Untill I started to learn I needed to first needed to find happiness within myself be true to myself just be me. I needed to stop trying to be someone else or someone I am not. I needed to learn that I had to believe in myself and really gave a passion for what I was doing. I had to work smart, hard, be self motivated and be determined like never before. I had to work on my personal development and develop to grow a stong mindset. How did work on my personal developement to grow my a strong mindset. First I had to work on my personsal self esteem, self worth, self confidence this meant I had to learn to stop nmegative talking to my self and start to postive talk to myself. God said in his word called the Bible "What ever a person thinks in her or his heart so what that person believes he or she is this is called stinky thinking." I had to change my negative thinking to positive thinking about myself deep down in my heart, mind, spirit and soul. I had to ask God to show me what he saw in me and why he loved me. I had to ask God help me with finding my true identy, my self worth, self esteem, and self confidence. I had to find my value, and worth in God and not people.

        I do not know what God has in store for me or what God has planned for me what I do know is that God is with me in everything I also know that God only wants what is the best for me. God is almighty, mercyful, caring, all loving, and all forgiving God. God wants to give me all the desries of all my heart. God wants to bless me I first must put God first in everything I do. Surrender to him give him my everything let him take control of my life. He will never let me down or let me go. Do not give up on your dreams give them to God your heavently father talk to him about your dreams your deepest hearts desires for he already knows them for he put them there in your heart to begin with. 

I Love My Pampered Chef Batter Mixer Dispenser

I just love my Batter Mixer Dispenser from Pampered Chef❗This genius idea and makes it easy to mix any kind of batter and dispense all from the same Gadget. I love using mine to mix and dispense pancake batter.

My only recommendation is don't use a better like the prepackaged muffin mix to make better due muffins that has anything in it like chocolate chips or berry pieces the dispenser at the bottom does not dispense out the berries or chocolate, chips the muffin mix does dispense out, there is other better shakers and mixer options.  I am sure my friend and Pampered Chef Consultant Nicole Orcult can help you out with all your questions and concerns❗

 Pampered Chef also has pancake molds to make different pancake shapes. This makes making and eating pancakes fun for the whole family.

Oh did I mention makes clean up easy.

Fun Heart Shaped Pancake

The heart shaped would be perfect for Valentines Day breakfast for your special someone❗

If your interested in any Pampered Chef Product or have questions Please Reach out to Nicole Orcult 

Nicole Orcult Facebook

Website Pampered Chef 

Have Your Ever Felt less than Prefect?

    Have you ever felt less than perfect? Well I am here to tell you that no your not perfect! 
Who is prefect? Nobody's perfect the only man that walked the earth who was prefect was Jesus Christ! While you and  I may be less than perfect that does not mean that we are complete failures. Yes we are less than perfect we will continue to make mistakes everyday! We can rest in Jesus Christ an that his promise that he loves us and he lives in us if we accept him as our Lord and Savior. Jesus loved us so much that he took lashes, beatings and died on the cross for all of our sins so we may have eternal life with him and his father our God in heaven. 

    We are to strive to be like Jesus and we are to consistently and constantly ask him for forgiveness because we will never be perfect we will always make mistakes everyday. We must know Jesus loves us for he showed us how much he loved us by taking our punishment for us on the cross. Jesus was our ultimate sacrifice there is no greater love than that. Would you take another's place for them?  Would you go to jail for someone else for a crime they committed? I am sure the answer you would give me would be no I would not go to jail for someone else for a crime they committed! Jesus loves us unconditionally and God loves us unconditionally for God sent his only son to be born as a baby to grow up just to take our place on the cross.

    My life is so far from perfect therefore I am far from perfect how can God and Jesus love me and forgive me? while we are so far from prefect we have made mistakes in our lives we can rest the peace in knowing that God loves us forgives our mistakes through Jesus his son who died on the cross for our sins. All we have to do is ask Jesus to come in our hearts and lives by professing with our mouths asking Jesus for repentance and forgiveness for all we done wrong. We must ask for repentance continuously everyday so Jesus may live in us and begin to change and transform our lives to become more like Jesus. We also  continuously ask for forgiveness so we may draw closer to God. 

The Bible says there is one way to Heaven. Jesus said: "I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man comes unto the Father but by me." (John 14:6) This one way is to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and savior and follow God's plans for our life which are laid out in the Bible.

Good works cannot save you. Faith in Jesus alone can save you.

"For by grace you are saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast." (Ephesians 2:8-9)

    

Prayer: Dear God, I am a sinner and need your forgiveness. I believe that Jesus Christ shed His precious blood and died for my sin. I am willing to change and turn from my sin. I now invite Jesus Christ to come into my heart and life as my personal Savior.